Cheap Trick or Treat

Hey all,

First off, I know there's been some crazy things happening lately, so hopefully wherever you're reading this from you and yours are safe and sound.

So I haven't been on here much lately. I hope you were all happy and excited for me cause that meant that my Big Sister wasn't making me doing horribly feminine things... Of course, October 31st is a bit of a different animal. I think she disappears around this time on purpose. As Halloween creeps closer and closer without hearing from her, my stomach starts to twist. I hold out hope that I won't have to dress up or at least I could go and get a male costume... but, what if she contacts me at the last minute? How am I going to get a costume on short notice? How do I pull it all off? What if she doesn't contact me? Does that mean I don't have to dress up for Halloween? Ever again? I mean if she doesn't want me to dress up for Halloween, maybe she's finally grown bored of me... but, the pit in my stomach grows wider. She's going to expect me in something. Maybe this is a test? What's worse; dressing like a girl when I didn't have to, or feeling the wrath of my Big Sister for not dressing up when she expects me to?

I wasn't going to do it. I was going to make a stand. Do you remember last year? I got punished for dressing up even when she didn't say anything?!!? I shook a little at the evening got later and later. With a whimper, I gave up... I slinked into my closet and started to pull through my feminine things to put together a costume.

But, not all was lost. If I was going to dress up, then I was going to pick up costume of MY choosing. It was going to be an image of what kind of girl I would be if I HAD to be a girl. This was not going to be girl-girl. This was not going to be pink. Not cutesy. No dresses. I was going to be cool. Powerful. Bad-ass. Ok, ok, the idea for my costume had come to me a while ago. A while ago. It wasn't for Halloween specifically, but I kept it in the back of my mind in case my Big Sis ever asked for my opinion. Plus, when I had to browse for girl stuff, my tastes seemed to skew this way. What kind of girls today are cool,  powerful, and bad-ass?? Rock chicks of course!

Of course a lot of costumes could be for a rock chick, and I wasn't about to buy a meat dress, or a bubble dress, or some crazy galactic orbit dress. Of in order to pull it off, I thought I'd try and set the scene with a collection of poses:

Is it just me or does it seem that more often than not, the Paparazzi tend to sneak up on unsuspecting celebrities from behind? But, they don't just sneak up on them, they also seem to take a pic from the back too. It's like back-up proof in case someone the celeb flees. It's like there version of the spotting Bigfoot picture. Figured I need one of these to make me seem rock star-ish.

Of course being a rock star, I don't want to be caught by the Paparazzi. So naturally, my hand has all but thrown out all evidence that this is a photo of me. But why don't I want to be photographed at wherever I am?? I mean, I probably just came out of an orphanage or I just handed over a large novelty cheque to a charity I support... right?

Yeah, I took an extra one. I'm a huge rock star so I have extra Paparazzi following me. Plus, I could get into the idea of obscuring my face in photos. Should be a staple in all future poses my Big Sis make me take.

And of course, even when I'm in one place, I'm really somewhere else. The important life of a rock-star celebrity. And naturally, because I'm being photographed I need to pretend to look bored. After all a rock star obviously much more important than whoever is on the other end of the line.

Unless of course the person on the other end is an underling. Than the rock star must be giving directions to this person to get things done for them in their important lives. Yup, clearly chatting with one of the many Personal Assistants to keep the rock star live running on all cylinders.

This is me at the show rockin' it out for all my adoring fans! Some of them would consider me a hero. A hero who plays guitar. I bet they'll even make a video game about this rock star some day!

Bad-ass, mama jamma! I taught Slash this pose.

All rock stars have that pose that while is obviously been rehearsed and burned into their muscle memory, is supposed to tell everyone this is how they are just naturally cool and just about the scene. Plus, it always makes for a good album promo photo. Or something.

So that was me on Halloween. Cool, right? I mean, it's like I've built a whole persona or whatever. You so totally like this as opposed to the ridiculous stuff my Big Sister had me doing, yeah? I mean, you're totally hooked on this alternate persona. I can tell. I think you should comment and let my Big Sis know you're more interested in seeing more about this new persona and any of the silly stuff she was coming up with. Plus, I haven't thought of a name yet for this new bad-ass girl side. Comment and give suggestions for a name. I was going to go with Moon Unit Zappa, but that didn't seem original enough.